Alright ... why the hell not let's try a running diary again.
I will start drinking at any point now (the turkey's ready in 2 hours), so be warned.
1100 - Wow, NBC is kicking CBS' ass in Macy's parade coverage. I never even heard of the people on CBS and not all the stuff is from the parade. I think their target demo really is the 54-90 age range.
1110 - I love the Roots, but why Jimmy Fallon? Does he have something on ?uestlove? Having Fallon lyp-synch to Run DMC's Christmas in Hollis was just weird.
1115 - Country music - Yep, time to crack open the first beer.
1140 - Rubbed the turkey down, another hour + to go. I'm starting with an American beer for the occasion - a Sam Adams. Gave a bit to the bird, hopefully that wasn't a bad idea.
1145 - Had to switch to the Pregame, the parade was about to make me nauseous. Too many kids.
1152 - To clear up any confusion - the bird that got a drink is the one in the oven. Although I should get a canary to live here, in case of toxic fumes.
Made the mistake of switching back to parade - oh boy. Christmas music and Santa ... Sigh
1157 - the Audio on Fox is all messed up. I may kill myself.
For the record - my predictions today: Dallas chokes; Detroit gets blown out and tonight is a comedy of errors.
1200 - Had to switch to College roundball - Creighton v Michigan. The audio is out of synch and it crackles on fox. There's no way I can listen. I may need to watch on mute. This sux huge donkey balls.
1218 - I assume the 15 next to Michigan is their National ranking and not their seed in this tournament (quarter-final #1 of Old Spice classic). They are giving Creighton a beating.
1223 - Fox is still messed up and they all picked the Giants. Going East to West on a short week. Really? You're all that sure of the team with the lesser record winning? Eli is better on the road, but his balls don't exactly cut the wind.
1233 - Rogers was trying to help, but in the meantime City TV feed has taken over, so ... who knows. As long as it works I don't care anymore
1235 - FOOTBALLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!
1238 - Lions have first and goal again. Jordy? Is that really a man's name? Nice fumble white boy. And roughing the passer? Shouldn't he be touched hard enough for him to notice? Ugh. This is gonna screw with my prediction. But it's still the Lions!
1242 - Touchdown Lions ...
1248 - Turns out Det is 31st in Defense and 32nd against the pass because they have a bunch of new players. Didn't they finish 0-16? I don't think newness is the problem here.
1252 - The rub was a bad idea, but the beer seems good at first glance. There's a slightly (okay mostly) burnt crust, but it's just the skin. Tenting now while the potatoes cook.
103 - Picked off ... There's the Lions I know!
110 - Touchdown - Donald Lee on a screen. Lucky 7's across the board.
123 - Turkey status: Delicious and moist. Pants status: off. Sam Adams status: #3
133 - First and goal. Let me throw 3 screen passes outside the 5 yard line and see if something can happen. You realize the defensive backs aren't running 30 yards downfield, right? 10-7 Packers. Idiots.
140 - Another pick. Big surprise. C'mon GB, don't screw this up.
147 - 1st and goal ... yep another short pass, at least it was incomplete
151- Yep. Once again the 31st best defense (that one from worst if you don't know) stops the Packers. 13-7. Still idiots. 1 minute left in 1st half.
200 - Halftime.
212 - Am I supposed to know who any of these people performing are? Melanie Fiona; Hal Linton; Kem and whoever the first one was? I'm old...
215 - oh, they let a white boy perform a Martha & the Vandellas song. That makes sense. Motown is all about that! Not just white. Emo white!
221 - Total yards. 256-78 ... again. idiots.
Ha! ... Another pick! Packers ball.
241 - Touchdown. That took forever. Packers 20-7
256 - Touchdown ... I was sooo right. Packers 27-7
257 - Beverage update: Grolsch, a nice Dutch brew.
end of 3
300 - Michigan won earlier, now it's Marquette v Xavier. What is this tourney? It's kinda awesome ... was it always here? I feel cheated. I need answers dammit.
310 - Ummmm... Why don't the Lions' 2 Johnsons have their first initial on their backs? They play the same damn position...
311 - 3rd and goal for Detroit. This is not ending well.
313 - Yep. No points.
320 - A safety for Detroit. Good on ya. 2 points will not make any difference though. Do you have a 20 point play in there?
331 - After a FG, everyone expects an onside kick with 5 minutes left. Sneaky Detroit kicks it away so that they can lose more easily. Awful nice of you.
335 - Yep. Stafford throws a TAINT. Good job rookie. Packers 34-12
348 - Matt Flynn is the QB now for GB. After McCarthy challenged a fumble and won, in a 22 point game. With 2 minutes left. Stay Classy GB.
351 - 18 seconds left. Prediction #1 was accurate for me. Game over. 34-12
357 - Apparently Lechler of OAK really wants to hit the scoreboard. Uhhhh Why?
421 - What's the ruling on leftovers? It's 3 hours later. Is it - If a microwave is involved = leftovers?
Also - if the Raiders are that much better with Gradkowski, why wasn't he starting earlier. (They are much better, btw. Jamarcus is one of the worst all time)
455 - 1st quarter done. Not exactly the most exciting. 3-0 Dallas.
505 - Touchdown Dallas on a big run. I'm pretty sure Tom Cable will now punch someone for failing to tackle. I suggest the pro-bowler, send a message coach!
523 - Doink.... stays 10-0 Dallas.
I'm bored. And not even tipsy enough, even though I've tried.
535 - Am I supposed to know who or what a Daughtry is?
539 - I'm so smart. Also - is anyone over 20 excited about the holidays? Enough with the ads.
600 - Seriously. Who are these guys? At least the nobodies in the earlier games were doing known songs. Let's get a local wedding band to perform at halftime ...
609 - So, the Cowbows are really clicking? they've scored 17. Not 37. Against the Raiders.
620 - You know why there's still so many ads for the Bills in Toronto? 2 cheapest tix will cost you $220. To see the Bills. From the top of the upper deck. Cause the bottom of the upper deck is over $100 more. To see the Bills. The only AFC team that existed in 1999 to not make the playoffs this decade (only NFC team - Detroit). Just sayin'
630 - The Raider comeback has started. TD. 17-7. But listening to commentary you'd think the Cowboys were cruising with a 21 point lead.
635 - The Dallas offense that's really clicking just punted for the 4th time. GB who couldn't finish didn't punt until the 4th Q.
646 - Wow Oakland sux. Even Roy Williams can catch a TD. 24-7
725 - Well that's finally over. I don't care about Simms' cobbler, for the record.
913 - I'll end it on this ... I'm pretty sure I just heard McDaniels use Motherfuckin' and drop another f-bomb. I smell an FCC fine...
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